Inventions for a Better Society

Consider the following: It's 3am and you're all alone on a Thursday night. You reach for the remote control and flip though the channels, only to find that there's nothing on but fishing or something. You reach for the Xbox only to remember that it's in the 'shop' for the 14th time since you bought it - also you're back in 2006  when the Xbox 360 was actually that bad.

That's when you feel it, a numbing in your skull, a side effect of your brain going without entertainment for a few minutes. You need a distraction. So, I present to you; a number of ideas for your consideration.  

 Idea: iPhone App that Builds a Better Version of Itself

Some might hear this idea and say "Big deal, an app that can download updates. Welcome to the 21st century, grandpa". It is a big deal, as a matter of fact. My app doesn't download updates from the Internet. I never used the term "update". I said "build a better version of itself". Completely autonomously, my app will be able to look itself over and upgrade itself, allowing it to perform it's function more quickly and efficiently. What is it's function? It's function is to build better versions of itself. It sounds like some sort of advanced artificial intelligence, then… well moving on.

Related: Why I hope that true artificial intelligence is impossible

 Idea: Particles that Physically Bond with Salt

Water is a major problem around the world. More specifically, fresh water availability is a major problem around the world. Current sources of fresh water are strained as populations swell. Water filtration and desalination systems can be effective, but only on a large scale, and require vast amounts of energy. Instead, one can collect salt water and mixes this ingredient in. The ingredient bonds with the salt in the water, which then sinks to the bottom of the container, leaving behind fresh water. Third-world countries situated near coastlines would benefit greatly from this technology, creating cheap, plentiful drinking water. Landlocked nations may still prove challenging from a logistical perspective.

Idea: 'Rate my Ass'

'Rate my Ass' is unlike other "Rate my Blank" apps or websites. Where those services are reliant on other users scoring ass, this system works differently. Once servers are up and running, the user will be able to take a snapshot of his/her ass and upload it to the servers. Once the transfer is complete, complex algorithms are used to determine the quality of the ass, factoring in photo quality and whether the ass in question belongs to a male or female (as it has long been established that females possess far superior ass). Once the analysis is complete, a numerical, decimal-based score, ranging from one to ten (ten being the best possible score) with a maximum of three digits to the right of the decimal point, is sent back to the user. The final score directly correlates with the quality of the user's ass.