Sneeze, Noun: Your Annoying Room-Mate

Have you ever sneezed? Probably. I sneezed just now. Four times in a row. Four! You know how annoying that is? I'm in the middle of owning on Battlefield, or writing something, or maybe I'm just watching a movie. Doesn't matter what I'm doing, eight million fucking sneezes in a row seem to come out of no-where for the sole purpose of wasting my time!

You'll know they're coming, about four seconds before, and you'll know that for the next fifteen seconds you can't do shit. Nothing at all, but wait. What a waste of time. I got shit to do! Every time I sneeze, all I think is "fucking hurry up and get this over with so I can get back to my life!".

It's like having an annoying room-mate who disturbs you when you're trying to read Cracked or something. Then again, you can bludgeon an annoying room mate to death with a wine bottle, so I prefer the room mate. 

Even worse are those sneezes that happen when you’re driving. Holy crap! What the fuck, sneeze? You tryin' ta get me killed, dawg?! Speeding down the road in tonnes of glass and metal, capable of killing dozens of people isn't enough apparently, it needs to be done while having a fucking spaz attack, too! With your eyes closed, no less.

Fu-cking sneeze.